10/27/06 - 11:31 p.m.

Big news today - and I think I've learned something about myself.

I think I hate my job, and I don't want to admit it to myself. So if I ever start to feeling happy, sooner or later I have to admit that I'm going back in to that job. And I try to tell myself I don't hate it.

And then there's this conflict because what I really feel and what I'm telling myself. And I try to distract myself online rather than face up to it. Which means I end up staying up late...

And then I can't sleep.