Get your own
 diary at DiaryLand.com! contact me older entries newest entry

04/23/2022 - 5:46 p.m.

I have a question about the new boss at work. Why do I hate them so much?

I mean, I should know the answer: it was when they tried to drag me back in on the weekend to re-do some work. And then I'd yelled and screamed and actually prevailed and convinced the higher-ups that that didn't need to happen. But really, that horrible episode fed into a larger storyline: that my time wasn't being respected.

Actually, that would explain why I hate the boss pretty well....

I mean, we had some conversations -- several, actually -- where I explained that I didn't want to get work emails on the weekend. That I didn't want to stay late after work just in case they needed anything else. So yeah, several conversations.

The thing is, it's one of those things that can't be addressed. "Different styles," someone might say. Someone in HR. With a smile. Before telling you to get out of their office and stop complaining...

I talked to a friend of a friend who is also a professional counselor, and they laughed like this was common, and said cheerily that you just have to repeat your boundaries, over and over again, until it finally makes an impression. So, I guess we're doing that -- and I guess that's the solution to "different styles" or "different definitions of boundaries."

But it did get bad. I guess because it's technically a boss-underling relationship. And also because I'm not good at standing up for what I want -- probably due to some distant behavior from a long-ago dysfunctional family. I should probably remind myself that it did get better -- the relationship at work, I mean. I did reassert my boundaries, again and again, and the interruptions on weekends ended and so did the unnecessary emails.

Hooray?

Pick another - Previous - Next


about me - read my profile! read other Diar
yLand diaries! recommend my diary to a friend! Get
 your own fun + free diary at DiaryLand.com!