11/23/10 - 11:37 p.m.

I had a lot of pressure today. New, sudden deadlines appeared, torpedoing my carefully planned schedule. And yet I did everything that came up -- every single thing. And then took a break, before getting to that last pile of work that I'd put off until tomorrow.

Which is the last day before Thanksgiving. So there's yet-another deadline I'm dealing with. And I didn't think it'd be a problem -- until my girlfriend came home with some secret private insanity.

What I hate about the "secret private insanities" is she can't actually tell you that they're there. You'll be having a conversation, and then she'll blurt out a sentence from the planet Pluto. It makes sense to her. There's a whole series of sentences that follow it. It's like she forgets the "topic sentence" -- the one that explains how this ties in to what the two of you had actually been talking about. Prior to the "secret private insanity" kicking in.

Finally, I get frustrated about this. Because it's frustrating. I think that's a reasonable reaction. But what I hate, hate, hate is that she can't actually have a conversation about how burnt out and incoherent she is. Because she's already slowly slumping into burnt-out incoherence.

It's like she just drops out of the relationship periodically...

Anyways, I was really mad. She went to bed early, and we didn't "talk it out". Because all I really wanted was some distance between me and her insanity.

But, if you remember, I still have that pile of work I have to do. Before Wednesday, because it's the very last day before Thanksgiving. And I just realized: I don't want to.

I've dealt with a lot of stress already today. I don't want to deal with any more. And this absolutely crazy "crisis on planet girlfriend" has apparently sapped whatever energy I had left.

Or is that just an excuse? I told myself earlier this morning that I have as much energy as I *think* I have. That we tell ourselves that we "need a break" when we want to re-play some bad passive behavior from our childhood.

When the truth is, we're unstoppable, rock and roll machines...